What is your most important defense against the slings and arrows of, well, you know?
you really know how to hurt a guy, albadger! see? the tears are already starting to flow. i guess i’d better listen up to what you are saying behind those slings and arrows. probably tomorrow i’ll feel better enough to talk to you about this again.
You are given a baby to raise. What special thing would you do for the child that would surprise people who know you?
i’d let the baby choose its own name when it could articulate one.
Where in the world would you like a new volcano to appear?
i’m tempted to give the easy answer, and say the white house, or maybe crawford, texas, but those are too pat. how about this? i’d like to see a volcano appear in the heart of every person in the world who feels as if they don’t matter. volcanos always announce great change in the world, they bring destruction and renewal, and are a terrific creative force.
Identify a trait of yours that you think is negative or destructive. What positive purpose does this trait serve?
even with all the exciting activity in my life these past few weeks, i am still terribly lonely. this sense of loneliness makes it easy for me to want to go out and have empty promiscuous sex. i just don’t seem to understand how to meet the men that i am interested in dating. sure, i can get laid, but i want, i NEED, more than that. fortunately, i have been just too busy to go out and be self-destructive, but that singular screaming voice is trying to drown out all other thought. the need to fight against unethical sluttiness is producing some positive benefits in my life, though. i’m much more focused on my new business venture, getting myself back into traffic-stopping shape, and just letting myself feel more.
it’s painful to be lonely, but i can endure the pain until it ends, with the help of the Comfortor. and i know it will end; it always does, eventually.
What is your favorite way of confusing people?
oh, albadger, each person gets their very own way of being confused by me. when you chop the salmon into small dice, squeeze the juice of one lemon over the top, and serve.
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