if you wriggle your ass at me when i’m massaging you, i’m just going to get pissed off, and reach up under your ribcage and squeeze your heart. that is all.

June 29th, 2003 | Uncategorized | No comments

Sometimes I’m not sure what my role is on this team, but I don’t care, because when we are firing on all cylinders, like we were last night for the opening night of the Trash Film Orgy, Northern California’s Most Notorious Midnight Movie Show, that stuff just stops mattering.

Everyone was focused as we went about our tasks: get the vehicles loaded, and driven over to The Crest Theater, unloaded and the sets up and ready. Unfortunately, Sid, the Evit Crest Manager, who is also one of our cast members, mistakenly booked a 2215 movie, so we had a very slim window for setting up the Mighty Quiz Tiki, our co-host for the evening. QT, as we call him, is a 12 foot tall tiki head with flames, and smoke and lights and all sorts of stuff. He doesn’t take that long to set up, but we only had between 2140 and 2215 to get the house props and set loaded and ready.

After the movie started, we could decorate the lobby. I’ve got to hand it to Zack, our set designer, and Darin, who is QT and our main graphics guy, the Trashopolis set in the lobby was fantastic. I’ll be putting the pics up presently.

Amy and Christy, as always, were firmly in charge of getting the show up and going. Amy is our stage manager and I guess during show-time, I would be her number one. We armed ourselves with my walkie-talkies and went about our business. Christy is basically the power behind the scenes, and while we take our marching orders on the ground from Amy on show nights, Christy is in charge.

Patrick, DJ Junior, was spinning his discs on some shaky, borrowed equipment, but the sounds were flowing. When we heard our cue music, we were all set. Those bloody smoke machines take a long time to heat up enough for use, dag nab it. Lesson learned. So, with Darin providing the voice and me the glowing mouth and smoke effects, the show started. Darin introduced Keith, aka Francois Fly, that half-human, half-fly monstrosity, who is our host. Keith originated the idea of TFO, and recruited Darin and Christy to produce it. This is his last year with the show, though, as he just became a member of the Velvet Hammer Burleque troupe, and wants to devote more time that his own troupe, I Can’t Believe It’s Not Comedy.

The first part of the show consisted of the Zombie Army mobbing Evil Sid onstage but, she’s “too greedy to die.” Then the first two reels of the film, and intermission. Next, we put the birthing table onstage, and Francois gets a now hugely pregnant Sid onto it and she delivers a Maggot Baby, which Francois denies is his; a gorilla baby, which our character Kogar the Ape comes up and claims, and finally, the beautiful Zombie Baby, created by our terrific and new-this-year gore guy, Jace. The baby attacks Francois, who drop-kicks it into the audience, where some lucky member gets a cool souvenier.

The next three reels of the film, I finally get to sit down and relax and watch and heckle. Amy’s friend, Robyn, got us totally stoned, and my blarney muse was juiced-up and Amy and I tag-team delivered some great lines. We were really flowing, and getting the audience more and more into it. “Invagination” seems to be the motto of this year’s TFO. I’m kinda liking “Post-invagination,” though.

After the show, Zack and Amy and others handed out flyers for next week’s movie, “Blacula.” I got the crew to break stuff down and into the basement, while I carried QT into the fountain lobby of the theater for display during the week. We were all riding high as we headed off to the Catfish, Darin and Christy’s home, after their production company, Screaming Catfish. The adrenaline was still coursing through our veins, and I didn’t get home until 0500.

We had 488 paying customers, breaking our record! Now, next week, we expect that because of the 4th of July celebrations, our count will be lower, as people want to get out of town that weekend, but what an incredibly fun weekend so far.

June 29th, 2003 | Uncategorized | No comments